What is the Problem With Our Boys and Men?

By Renee Martinez, Founder of Raising Boys World

I read this article, The Problem With Boys…is actually a problem with men. By Tom Chiarella. WOW.

The author states, “We’ve ignored all the evidence of male achievement and ambition deficits and stood aside as our sons have notched a growing record of failure and disengagement. It’s time we did something about it. A call to action.”

He continues, “But here’s the deal if you are a boy in this country right now: You’re twice as likely as a girl to be diagnosed with an attention-deficit or learning disorder. You’re more likely to score worse on standardized reading and writing tests. You’re more likely to be held back in school. You’re more likely to drop out of school. If you do graduate, you’re less likely to go to college. If you do go to college, you will get lower grades and, once again, you will be less likely to graduate. You’ll be twice as likely to abuse alcohol, and until you are twenty-four, you are five times as likely to kill yourself. You are more than sixteen times as likely to go to prison.”

When I’m out with all four of the boys, people inevitably comes up to me and make comments. They always ask if I still want a girl or if I’m going to try again. What makes them think that they have any right to comment on my fertility is beyond me. The people that make these comments always feel the need to tell me about how wild and destructive their sons, or their friend’s son, or their neighbor’s sons are. Like I care. They say this useless information in a way that almost seems cruel. Like here I am with FOUR boys. What am I suppose to say in response? I’m certainly not about to join in on the bashing session!

Also, what do their ignorant comments mean to my sons when they hear them. I’ll tell you…my oldest has commented to me when someone has said something about me wanting a girl or talking down wild boys. He said “it doesn’t sound like that lady likes boys.  Why not?”.

What messages is society communicating about boys? What do you think on this subject? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

About the Author:  Renee Martinez consults and speaks professionally on social media marketing, integrated marketing communications, public relations and branding. She is the president of Ruby Marketing Communications (www.rubymarcom.com), a boutique marketing communications company that specializes in providing branding, social media strategy and integration, and creative services. Her blog (www.reneemartinez.com), provides resources on everything marketing and social media for her active audience. 
Renee has contributed as a featured monthly columnist in the monthly jewelry industry publication, JCK, on matters related to internet marketing as well as in InStore Magazine as a featured blogger where she writes about developing effective marketing strategies for the jewelry industry using social media. She is the founder of: Social Media Biz Summit (www.socialmediabizsummit.com), the first large-scale SM conference to come to Buffalo, NY; #jewelrychat, a weekly twitter chat for the jewelry industry and www.RaisingBoysWorld.com. Renee teaches social marketing courses at Canisius College in Buffalo, NY for the business school as well as offers small group social media marketing training and educational seminars for businesses in Western New York and beyond.
Renee has dabbled in the internet marketing arena since the early 90′s and is not ashamed to call herself a “marketing geek”. From chatting in AOL, “sharing” music on Napster, and teaching HTML classes before it was considered “cool” to developing comprehensive social media strategies, effective public relations campaigns and managing online communities (most recently Chevy Girls Buffalo).
She enjoys being able to help people find their voice online and to create buzz about their product or service that will give them the results they desire. 
Renee can be found on Twitter (@reneemmartinez) and Facebook (http:/www.facebook.com/RubyMarCom).